Naked I stood in the shower last night. With my eyes closed and my forehead on my arm against the wall, I stood, naked in the shower. Baring my all, tired of hiding beneath these clothing of lies and deceit. Tired of carrying the weight of these clothes on my shoulders and having them clinging to my skin and not letting me go. I try to take off these lies but they keep getting caught at my ankles, at my neck, around my wrists REFUSING TO LET ME GO!!
Leave me alone.
Naked I stood in the shower as I centered the high-pressured stream of water on the top my head trying, hoping, longing for the battle of thoughts of excuses of lies and of shame will be washed out or at least made clean. I asked for my forgiveness to come in the form of that stream of water I let bang on my head and run through my hair and on my skin. Slowly I turned up the heat. If I cannot washed these lies out I will BLOODY BOIL THEM OUT!!!!
Leave me alone.
Naked I stood in the shower, letting the stream of water carry the tears that streamed from my eyes to run over my heart
Forgive me.
Naked I stood in the shower. Never so hard has shampoo been kneaded into my scalp as I am trying to get the lies cleaned from the inside out. Never so hard, intentionally, has my skin been scraped as though trying to scoop out the disgusting deceit from my pores and flick the excuses from underneath my fingernails.
I finally turned off the shower and the water drip drip dripped from my hair, off my breasts and my fingertips, down my thighs and into the drain. I see it all wash away.
…But then after I'm dry again simply to remain in society's favour I open those drawers and put on those clothes once more to cover up my now clean nakedness.
Maybe I just need to throw those clothes in the shower too.
Please, forgive me…
Thursday, November 5, 2009
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So raw and deeply emotional. I hope you get the succor you ask for. Take care...
ReplyDeleteThanx Myne, working on it. :)
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