Monday, March 3, 2014

Struggling with the 90%


“Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it” - C.R. Swindoll

(For all those who landed on this page thinking this was something Wall Street / Political / Serious business issues.... sorry... #KanyeShrug)

Here is my most recent 10% : 
1. Impacted wisdom tooth extraction - I'll spare you the gory details and just say it wasn't pretty. And also that Dr. House must be very good at handling pain, because Vicodin doesn't do Sh. 
2. Having a lazy day, and decide I'd cook for a change, of course, I need groceries. I go out and find 1/4 of my car gone. I exaggerate, but either way the car is not drivable. And the very smart person didn't leave a note.
3. During of the above events, my new team at work as needed me to be at a prep meeting for a client pursuit.

My current 90%:
&*%#($&*^@#$)(@#*(#$&(^#@%$)*#&@*)&^$)@(#)*&$^(*@&#%$(&^@%)&&^@#@^!@$
(I'm trying to depict passionate swearing here, however, this just looks like a fancy page border to me...)

The 90% I'm trying to get to: 
1. It was the last complicated tooth! Yay! 
2. I wasn't in the car! Yay!
3. Worst case scenario means I eventually get a new car! Yay!
4. I have time to fix the potentially horrid perception my new team not has of me... I think. 

Intellectually, I know that the second 90% is the way to go and there are multiple benefits that come with thinking that way and thinking positively and blah blah yackidy schmack, but it's hella hard to get there emotionally. 
I tried to figure the very specific reasons why I was so upset about it. 

Was it because my currently asymmetrical face was fighting hard for attention as though the pain it caused wasn't attention grabbing enough? 
Because of the money I'm going to have to dish out for the car?
The chance that insurance was going to see it as a complete loss? (Which they did)
The inconvenience? 
My new team has everlasting memory and will hold me to a perception created by things I could not control? 
Believing I could've controlled the events (never pulling the tooth, moving the car to a different spot, etc.)?

I dunno. It's all of those? How do I move my thinking from that to "I may get a new car yay!". Sigh. This is hard.... 

Lord help me because THIS STRUGGLE IS REAL!

Update: Guess who's on the market for a new car.
 
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